Writers’ Block


have you ever had writers’ block so bad

that the only thing you can think of

to rhyme with block

is cock

and then all you can think of is


which sucks

(or not, as the case may be)

have you ever been so constipated with words

that no matter how much you try

to squeeze them out

they     just      won’t     come    (much like with the cockblocking)

and you feel you’re so

full     of     shit

that if you even have a brain fart

some might seep out (much unlike the cockblocking)

maybe if you pull my finger

we’ll release something spectacular

or maybe just poop our pants  (how is that like cockblocking?)

have you ever been so pissed off

with your writers’ block

because you’ve got rhymes in you head

but nowhere they’ll fit

like “juxtapose” rhymes with “sucks ma toes”

(and we’re way past cockblocking now)

and “I’m vexed ‘cos I’ve not been sexed recently”

and “your platitudes give me attitude”


I could go on

but I can’t

‘cos I’ve got a case of

writers’ block

now, quick!

someone find me a cock!

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